Have you heard the old adage: “ if you fail to plan, you plan to fail…” Planning takes effort – it demands a conscious choice – and it’s an indicator of a proactive person.
If we want to encourage others – to inspire their hope in the future, strengthen their faith, show them unconditional love, lift them up in prayer, support them with joy filled zeal, stimulate them with new insight and validate them with intimate knowledge– then we need to design a plan to encourage.
A practical plan to start the encouraging process:
Which people play a key role in your life? Write their names on a piece of paper. Yes, write those names down. As Eleanor Roosevelt said, “It takes as much energy to wish as it does to plan.” Planning requires taking action.
Record beside their name a list of everything that’s going on in their life right now. Do you know?
If you don’t know, first take time to chat with them. This is time for them to talk and share – you’re there to:
1) Ask kind, probing, open-ended questions.
2) Listen to their answers. Be quiet and just listen – do not share your opinions.
3) Watch their eyes – it’s been said that the eyes are the windows to the soul.
4) Pay attention to their body language.
5) Notice - through vocal inflection - what they’re excited about or fearful over.
6) Really hear them. Hear the feelings and emotions lying under the words.
Now that you know some of what’s going on in your friend’s heart, mind and soul, it’s time to build your plan.
Ask yourself:
If we want to encourage others – to inspire their hope in the future, strengthen their faith, show them unconditional love, lift them up in prayer, support them with joy filled zeal, stimulate them with new insight and validate them with intimate knowledge– then we need to design a plan to encourage.
A practical plan to start the encouraging process:
Which people play a key role in your life? Write their names on a piece of paper. Yes, write those names down. As Eleanor Roosevelt said, “It takes as much energy to wish as it does to plan.” Planning requires taking action.
Record beside their name a list of everything that’s going on in their life right now. Do you know?If you don’t know, first take time to chat with them. This is time for them to talk and share – you’re there to:
1) Ask kind, probing, open-ended questions.
2) Listen to their answers. Be quiet and just listen – do not share your opinions.
3) Watch their eyes – it’s been said that the eyes are the windows to the soul.
4) Pay attention to their body language.
5) Notice - through vocal inflection - what they’re excited about or fearful over.
6) Really hear them. Hear the feelings and emotions lying under the words.
Now that you know some of what’s going on in your friend’s heart, mind and soul, it’s time to build your plan.
Ask yourself:
- How can I inspire them with hope for their future?
- How can I bring my faith into focus to provide strength – to fortify them?
- How can I notice them – the person they are, not their behavior – and foster them with unconditional love?
- What can I pray for in their life? Can I pray with them to uplift them?
- What action can I take today to give them my joy-filled support?
- What new insight into their situation can I stimulate them with?
- How can I use my intimate knowledge of my friend to validate them?
Be specific when answering these questions. Be diligent, and thoughtful. Be creative and insightful. Building on small words, ideas and gestures will make your friend feel wrapped in encouragement, thereby transforming your relationship with them.
You will be an encourager – a light in their life, and a voice of possibility in their ear.
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